Cooking with Arthritis

Cooking With Arthritis                                   It was the crack of dawn, as tiny breeze rustled the leaves on a mighty oak that engulfed the west side of our old three story farmhouse. My legs straddled the peak of the dormer trimmed in paint peeled gutters. The view is absolutely breath taking. As the sun climbed ever so slowly from its bed, the birds began their morning melody, serenading a musical salad bar, peppered with a delicate assortment of fluttering breakfast selections. I could the almost taste the sweet peppery beacon sizzling in that hot cast iron griddle perched atop a civil war era wood stove. When Maw hollard up for me ta come an eat, I slammed my laptop closed, tucked it under my chin, in one motion scrambled down the spout. Smells good ma! Ya know what day is taday, Their havin that walk-a-long for all the survivors of that crippling disease arthritis. Member that gal who lived down by the creek, Malinda Winner, she’s the one putting it on. “ I’m havin a bad time right now boy. My arthritis is painin me real bad ,you go ahead without me. It says right in her complete illustrated guide to cooking with arthritis, ya got-a keep movin Ma! How bout that drug Enbrel, Fer when ya git them autoimmune diseases, the doc give ya, ain’t it workin. I give em ta Paw, he’s the one that hast ta go out an work in all that pain. He needed them more! Paw has autoinnune diseases too! It shore don’t seem ta bother him too much. If that’s the case Maw you better study up Melinda’s cookbook. She got this way of trickin arthritis , with helpful tips for livin with arthritis without causin yourself a lot extra pain. It will make your life easier maw, With Enbrel and Melinda’s guide to livin better, ya might wanna start feedin the hogs again. That sounds real exciting boy, you better git goin if ya want ta win the walk-a-long, I’ll be just fine here by myself. I went ahead jogin the five miles ta town, I needed to warm up soes I wouldn’t pull a mussel in the walk-a-long, you know how that feels. About half way ta town, I started ta see cars parked along the berm, the closer I got, the more cars I saw they’s was parked on both sides of the road. They’s was parkin in the fields, this Milinda shore knows how ta throw a wingding. They had cookin booths demonstratin how to cook with arthritis, doin your chores with arthritis. Hell you could gitcha a Bed Buddy, when ya feelin poorly. You can put em the freezer or the microwave dependin if your swelled or just sore from arthritis pain. I still don’t see Melinda Winner, when ya git widely known ya git come late and make a grand entrance in one of them helicopters, the kind with the winders all blacked out soes when she pops out you git the whole package at one time. I still don’t see her, Everybody’s linin up ta go. I looked over the crowd ta find a spot that I could make my break-away move, that means to git out ahead of everybody. I gotta win that grand prize for Maw, ya git a mess of assorted bed buddy’s, they’s got something for every pain that ails ya, and a signed copy of Melinda Winner’s A Complete Illustrated Guide to Cooking With Arthritis. Hey lookie, What do we have here, She looks friendly enough . Mornin Maim Are ya fixin ta win this here race. Good morning, and you are she ask. They call me boy. I glad to meet you Boy, I’m Melinda, and you could call me Mindy. Are you fixin to win this walk-a-long. She said. She was so nice I couldn’t help spillin my guts, About Maw missin the race and all. I was half way there, before I realized the race had even started. We talked and talked like two friends sittin in front of the barber shop. She said she had to run, I thought that odd for a walk-a-long, I was a little sad that I gabbed like a school girl at her first sleep over, and most of the walkers already finished the race. I just kinda milled around when I noticed a lot of em was pickin up cups that joggers dropped along the route. The trash bag collection area was located in the parkin lot right next an old truck, that looked a lot like my turnip truck. Just then the door opened and that Mindy, the one from the race said Throw that bag in the back. Are ya walkin , need a ride, jump in front. We had just pulled up to the house and noticed Maw swingin on the porch. That’s when Mindy poped out of the truck introducing herself as Melinda Winner. Imagine the look on my face getin that tidbit down without a swig of grandmaw’s ol fashion sippin wiskey. Maw hung on every word as the hours passed. By the time Paw got home from work, Mindy had a gourmet meal on the table, fit for a king. She gave us a Signed copy of her new book and we all sat on the front porch swaddled in bed budd’ys until the moon settled in the valley. By Thomas Painter ……. Grampata

What an amazing story of true love for Mel and how much you resept her. Great way to discuss what she teaches , lol it was so funny I needed a good luaugh

how ya buddy !

This puts me in a good mood. i SEE WHERE Mel gets her hope for life Kepping us laughing while in pain good job

you are killing me its like watching a laugh out loud commercial see I can't spell lol great way to tell people its important to take our meds and move always keep moving , lol so FUNNY !

love all the stories !

OK, grampata chef called and said read this one I am just going 2 die laughing. One question do you have a hilbilly accent ? I hope so its cute important messege you got across

I laughed the whole time ! It is a really fun way of helping me get my messege out there . Thank you for helping spread the word through laughter .

great story it was so funny and it got a great message across. Instead of reading boring ststs I enjoyed a funny story great job now this is the best to date !

very funny stuff buddy ! enjoyed it ! good message

thats so dam funny, maw and pa. I was howling ! agree all the way a great way to get the message across move move and then move some more , lol good one bud

o my gosh you had me laughing. The way you talk like you know the tv show the waltons. Where are you John boy , lol. I agree what a cute way to get the message across. You stories are tops in my book grampata

WHEE LOVING THIS ONE GRAMPS ! YOU TOOK IT TO A WHOLE NEW LEVEL ! GREAT GREAT GREAT READ MY FRIEND !